Friday 20 January 2012

(Day 50) Your step-Grandma


This weekend you got to meet your step-grandma. We shall call her 'Aunty T'.

Or 'Grandma T' (the suggestion of your 11 year old sister)

Or GT (suggested by your 13 year old sister)

or G-Tiz (currently tentatively used by your big brother)


There is a current (and very important) debate going on between your brother and your sisters about which name is most fitting, and I think that it is so particularly difficult because it is hard to find a name that conveys how they feel about their step-Grandma, but doesn't offend anybody or denote the roll of the other Grandma's in their life. 

Up until now, your step-grandma has been called Aunty. But your birth seems to have sparked this debate, with your big sister declaring that 'she isn't our Aunty, she has always been like our Grandma since we were born"

"... plus it is kinda weird having our Aunty be married to our Grandad"

You can't argue with that logic. 

I am sure that we are not the first family who has more steps, halves and other combinations than you can poke a stick at. Mummy and Daddy both have step brothers and sisters, and half brothers and sisters. Which means that you have a step-Grandma and a step-Grandad too. 

Regardless of the internal politics of adults and society, to your brother and sisters, your 'steps' and 'halves' are simply no different or any less important than any other people in your family. 

They are people who they have known all of their lives (or as long as they can remember). 

People who they have laughed and cried with. 

People who have held their little hands as toddlers

People who have taught them how to thread bait on to a fishing rod correctly (step-Grandad Anthony... the jury is currently out on a fitting name for him also!)

People who have fed them too much ice-cream when Mummy said "no"

People who their Aunties call 'Mum" and their cousins call "Grandma"

People who have been a fixture of their lives for as long as they can remember

And regardless of the labels put on them by the adults and society around them, to you and your brother and sisters, they are simply your family








5 comments:

Unknown said...

I apologise for the fuzzy picture - we don't have too many photo opportunities with GT but will endeavour to get a better one tomorrow!

Anonymous said...

I think Grandma Tizi is the best, don't worry about the quality of the photo, you still captured a lovely moment. If your kids and new bub have had GT in their life for ages then she's obviously a granny figure to them, I'd let the kids decide and let the adults deal with it. It sounds like she's a loving grandma in their eyes. Have fun with the name debate, I know we did and we have Grandma Jill, and Granny (who is the fun one the kids say). Thanks for sharing

Anonymous said...

Nevermind the fuzz, you have captured such a lovely moment! And I agree with Becky, let the kids call them whatever they please! Family is a wonderful thing, and we should embrace it with open arms, not get hung up on titles and genetic lines! My little boy has 6 grandparents (and an extra set of honorary grandparents - our neighbours), and 18 aunts and uncles (7 of which were adopted)...but they're all just family! (plus countless friends who have become honorary aunts/uncles!). My family component of that is two grandparents, and one uncle...so I LOVE that my husband has such a large family, and as my son grows, I'm quite sure he will love it too! So many wonderful role models, and SO MUCH LOVE! :)

Unknown said...

thank you Becky :-) Sometimes as adults we are so caught up in our own stuff that we completely overlook life through the eyes of our children. I sooo agree with you that we should 'let the kids decide and let the adults deal with it'. It is something that only the kids CAN decide. Thanks for taking the time to share in the little moments that make up our life!

Unknown said...

Thank you lovemama - family is THE most important thing in life. When we look back at the end of our lives on what we are proud of, the thing that we will most be proud of is our family. It sounds like you have a great big wonderful family to enjoy! I hope that my children have that as they grow up! Thanks for following along with us!